Which I suppose I must.Īndbutso a few weeks after we get back from Christmas break our junior year, I'm sitting in my Assigned Seat in precalc when Tiny waltzes in wearing his jersey tucked into his chinos, even though football season is long over. And now they aren't around, leaving me utterly bereft of social peers. Honestly, none of them ever seemed to like me, but they were around, which isn't nothing. Which I guess means that technically I left the Group of Friends, although it felt the other way around. This guy in the Group of Friends named Clint was talking about the letter at lunch, and in the process of talking about it, he called me a bitchsquealer, and I didn't know what a bitchsquealer was, so I was like, 'What do you mean?' And then he called me a bitchsquealer again, at which point I told Clint to fuck off and then took my tray and left.

After some school-board member got all upset about gays in the locker room, I defended Tiny Cooper's right to be both gigantic (and, therefore, the best member of our shitty football team's offensive line) and gay in a letter to the school newspaper that I, stupidly, signed.Ģ. Tiny has been my best friend since fifth grade, except for all last semester, when he was busy discovering the sheer scope of his own gayness, and I was busy having an actual honest-to-God Group of Friends for the first time in my life, who ended up Never Talking to Me Again due to two slight transgressions:ġ. Tiny Cooper is not the world's gayest person, and he is not the world's largest person, but I believe he may be the world's largest person who is really, really gay, and also the world's gayest person who is really, really large. To begin with, you cannot possibly pick your friends, or else I never would have ended up with Tiny Cooper. When I was little, my dad used to tell me, 'Will, you can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose.' This seemed like a reasonably astute observation to me when I was eight, but it turns out to be incorrect on a few levels.

Will grayson will grayson by john green